The Snakes
by Engel-des-Todes
Summary: This is a story where Harry is a punk and a Slytherin. There is lots of bad language in it so dont read it if you dont like that.
1. Chapter 1

Ok. New story! I should be working on my other one, but I needed to write a punkish Harry story... really I did. And I have a little writers block for my other story.I already have manyof the chapters written, but may not be able to post them in a timly fashion. Dont blame me, blame my crazy schedual. Soooooo... Enjoy this story: ) I hope you like it.

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Sneaking in the back door trying to be as quiet as possible, hoping his _family_ wouldn't wake up, a small boy about 10 or 11 years old dressed in black cargo pants and a Slipknot hoddie and combat boots was finally getting home at 12:30. He knew he would be in trouble if he was caught. Not only because he as out so late, but because he had been with his friends the whole time. Which of course was not allowed. The small boy was Harry Potter, 'The Boy Who Lived'. Only he didn't know that, he hardly even knew his name was Harry. His relatives only called him 'Boy' or 'Freak' and his friends called him 'Viper' due to Harry's unwillingness to share his real name and his uncanny love of snakes. He lived with his _loving_ relatives, the Dursley's, because his parents had died when he was an infant. Supposedly when they were driving drunk. Not that Viper _cared_ or anything. After all he _had_ made it this far on his own without them. His friends acted more as his family then his relatives did. Of course it is hard to consider the people who treat you as a slave family.

Viper was coming home so late because he had snuck out earlier in the day to see a movie with his friends and hang out at the mall. He had decided to hang out with them in the park until now so that he could seek back in easier. He and his friends were always doing stuff like this. Normally he didn't have to sneak out though. His relatives were usually happy to have him gone the whole day so they didn't have to put up with his presence. They had decided to keep Harry from seeing his friend this summer though because of the pranks he and his friends had pulled on Dudley, Harry _favorite_ cousin, over the school year. And it was the Dursley's job in life to keep 'that boy' from being happy, so no friends. They always managed to cause trouble anyway, so the Dursley's thought of it as killing two birds with one stone.

Harry hadn't taken the punishment well though and snuck out as much as he could. He was getting into more and more trouble about it as the summer went on and he was worried the Dursley's might lock him up in his cupboard for the rest of the summer if he wasn't careful. This didn't stop him from sneaking out as much as he could though.

Harry had almost reached the cupboard under the stairs that served as his room when the light in the living room right next door turned on. Viper froze in terror knowing what would probably happen next, but taking the opportunity to see if the Dursley's were stupid enough to not see him if he wasn't moving. It didn't work out seeing as you could see him perfectly with the light shinning on him. His eyebrow and cartilage piercings shinning in the light. You could now see the green tint to his hair that went to his earlobes and covered his right eye and the weird scar he had gotten in the car crash and the snake eye contacts in his black lined eyes in the light as well.

"BOY!" yelled Vernon, Vipers _loving_ uncle. "What have I told you about sneaking off like the freak you are to go play with those misguided friends of yours!?!" Vernon spat out. Viper glared, refusing to answer his enormous uncle. Both Vipers uncle and cousin were so overweight Viper wondered how they could move. Well that was Vipers opinion anyway, Petunia, Vipers Aunt, just thought they were hearty eaters. How she could be so skinny and think they're size was normal confused Viper to no end.

"…you are going to regret the day you met those freaks! Hell, You're going to regret the day you drunk parents brought you into this world!" Viper heard as he turned his attention back to his uncle. Viper felt himself being thrown roughly in to the cupboard and winced as he landed on the floor. He heard his uncle locking _all_ of the multiply locks on the door and knew he was going to be in there for a while. Vernon only locked _all_ off the locks when Viper was going to be stuck in the cupboard for a few days, normally he just locked two of the locks.

Great what am I gunna do now? thought viper glumly. Who knows how long I'm going to be stuck here! I wonder where Nagini is? Nagini was a dark, almost black, green boa constrictor Viper had found while working in the garden. She had seemed a little out of place, but Viper went with the flow, glad to finally have a friend. It was Nagini who had helped Viper find his friends. Viper had freaked out when he heard her talking the first time, that and the size of her had almost stopped him from picking her up and getting to know her. It had calmed him down to hear her tell him she would not eat him. She also explained that it was Viper that was talking snake speak and not Nagini talking human speak. Viper wondered how he could talk to snakes, but no one else could. Nagini told him it was because he was special, but refused to go into further detail until his 11th birthday.

Thank god there are only 3 more days until my birthday! Then I will finally know what the hell Nagini means when she says I'm _special_. I am sick and tired of waiting! Viper had tried to get the information out of her ever since, but she never said anything. Nagini had also warned him not to tell his friends his real name until his 11th birthday because they would know why he was so _special_, but would make a big fuss about it and not be his friend. Viper was tempted to tell them anyway, but decided it was better to have friends rather than more enemies. Dudley had made sure Viper never had any friends at school until his friends showed up, so Viper did everything he could to keep them his friends.

Viper remembered when he met his friends they would not talk to him until Nagini slithered up to say hi and then leave. He had just assumed they were big snake fans like him. That is how they all got their names. Vipers friends had decided to hide their own identities as well. Probably just to spite Viper and his weirdness. They had all chosen their favorite snakes as their names. They decided on Viper, Mamba, and Cobra. Oddly enough the teachers at school had Viper, Mamba, and Cobra written on their attendance sheets, so they didn't have to worry about their names being found out at school. They had become the best of friends in their fives years of knowing each other, quickly earning a reputation for being the tough kids in their grade. No one bothered them, not even the upper classmen. The people who annoyed them usually ended up severely hurt, so after a few weeks of people getting hurt, nobody ever bothered them again.

Viper was looking forward to his birthday this year more then ever. Not only because he would finally be told why he was _special_, but his friends had promised to take him to their houses! He had been friends with them for five years, but had yet to meet their parents or be invited to their houses. Even though they assured him their parents wanted to meet him. Or so his friends claimed.

-Thinking again Viper?- hissed a shadow in the corner of the cupboard.

-Yesss. How could you tell?- hissed Viper to the shadow he knew to be Nagini.

-You make a funny face when you think. It is quite amusing, but very Gryffindor of you.- hissed Nagini as she slid out of the shadows. Viper had never understood that insult. He just knew that being a Gryffindor was bad and being a Slytherin was bad. Nagini said he would understand when he turned 11. Speaking of that…

-Will you tell me now?- Viper hissed.

-3 days… only 3. You have waited this long perfectly fine. You will survive another 3 days.- hissed Nagini, chuckling.

-Great. More waiting. Why cant you tell me? Its only 3 days early! Besides I might be stuck in here another week and it will pass the time.- hissed Viper, mad that he would probably miss his best birthday ever because of the Dursley's.

-Hmmmm… I think it is time you met your friends parents. I will go grab your stuff from the Dursley's hiding place and we will leave through my hole when I return.- hissed Nagini as she slipped away.

-Wait! How am I going to fit through the whole. Its really small if you haven't noticed!... Nagini?- hissed Viper, but Nagini was already gone. How is she going to convince my friends to take me to there parents anyway? Uggg, Nagini can be so difficult! Viper sighed as he collected his hidden Walkman and CD's. I hate waiting. Viper thought as he turned on his Bullet For My Valentine CD and settled down to wait for Nagini.

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I hope you liked it! As I said before, I have a buch of chapters pre-written for this story. They are just not typed yet. I will try to have the next chapter up next week, but no promises.

-Fighter Pilot


	2. Chapter 2

Wow... I don't know what to say. I'll start with sorry. I cant believe it took me this long. Hehehe... yeah. I know this is short. Really short. But I figured its better then nothing and since I haven't updated in forever I thought this would have to do. I am actually working on typing it all up now. I mean it this time too. I have written more for the story as well. The next chapters will be longer. Yeah, so the reason I haven't updated in so long is because my summers are insanely full and then, shortly after school started up again, my computer died. Yup, apparently they don't sell chargers for laptops that are only 5 years old. And I didn't get a new computer until christmas. Great huh? Well, Im back finally. On a better note. Thanks soooo much for the reviews! They were wonderful. They are the reason this is out so soon after christmas. I had lost all that I had typed up when my computer died so I had to start all over. And Im not the fastest typer ever. Nor do I have much time to type this up. Your reviews helped me by giving me a reason to type it all up again. Ok, well on to the story! Yay!

Nope I dont own Harry Potter. Dang.

Chapter 2

Nagini slipped back into Vipers cupboard with his various band shirts, hoodies, and cargos, the only things he ever wore. His family kindly provided him with Dudley's old cloths, but Viper, understandably, hated wearing them.

-Viper! We're leaving. Come!- hissed Nagini from the shadows.

-How? I'm too big… since you obviously haven't noticed.- hissed Viper.

-You'll fit. Now come or we'll be late!-

Late? What the hell! Late for what?

-Late for what? What are you blathering on about?- hissed Viper

-You shall see. Come.- hissed Nagini rolling her eyes.

-Dumbass snake… Never tell me anything.-

-I was under the impression you were a snake as well Viper.-

-Oh bugger off.-

-Hmmm… We shall have to work on that language of yours. You may find yourself in pain if you talk like that in the presence of some people I know and you will be meeting… Eventually.-

-I'll speak however I fucking want to. And are we leaving or what?!- hissed Viper angrily annoyed Nagini had managed to win yet another argument.

-Perhaps…-

Viper gave her the finger.

-Oh alright. Were going. Follow me.- hissed Nagini exasperated.

Wow, Nagini was right I did fit. Hey this is pretty cool. I wonder how she did this? Its like magic or something.

Through the small whole in the wall there was a massive cavern much to big to fit under the cupboard. Not to mention, the whole in the wall had grown large enough for Viper to fit through comfortably. After about 10 minutes of following Nagini in the underground cavern, they stopped in a large open space roughly in the shape of a circle.

-We wait here.- hissed Nagini.

-Wait here? For what- hissed Viper confused.

-Your friends! Who else?-

-And they will know how to get here… how? I doubt they even know this place exists.-

-You shall find out everything soon enough.- Nagini hissed evasively while Viper banged his head against the wall. A few minutes later Vipers friends and a man that looked scarily like his friend Cobra popped out of nowhere holding an old sneaker.

-Holy shit! Nagini! How did they do that? And don't even think about telling me to wait until my birthday.- hissed Viper in surprise.

-Hush! Why don't you ask them? Also, lay off the snake speak. It worries some people.- hissed Nagini.

"Cobra! Mamba! How the bloody hell did you do that!?!" yelled Viper still thoroughly surprised.

While Viper and Nagini had their conversation Cobra, Mamba, and the newly dubbed older Cobra dude were staring at Viper in shock. Although hiding it very well, thank you very much. Cobra and Mamba knew Viper had a special connection to snake, but they never would have guessed he was a parselmouth. Older Cobra dude on the other hand had more on his mind. He recognized Viper for who he really was, aka Harry Potter. He realized this due to the fact Vipers scar was showing from behind his bang. Also he vaguely resembled his long dead father James Potter. Older Cobra dude had never thought his sons mesterious friend 'Viper' could possibly be the infamous 'boy who lived', especially because of Vipers familarity with the Dark Lords familiar Nagini. And now he was supposed to teach him about magic!? Why couldn't Nagini do it? Viper obviously understood her!

"We'll explain when we get to my house." said Cobra.

-I hate waiting- hissed Viper angrily.

"English!" said the older Cobra with an air of authority. The man was tall, had long white blond hair and looked like an aristocrat who always got what they wanted.

-Fuck off! Who asked you?- hissed Viper. Then in English he spat out, "Cobra, is that your _dad_? Viper did _not_ like being told what to do like that.

"You got a problem with that?" said Cobra angrily.

"Viper! Cobra! Shut it! Your both being idiots! Viper, please speak English so we can all understand you. Cobra, give Viper a break. You know he has issues with people who try to control him, and with good reason. You've heard the stories of his 'family' same as I have." said Mamba making quote signs with his fingers when he said family.

-Idiots. I'll talk like this whenever I bloody well want to.- Viper hissed, just to spit everyone.

-ENGLISH! NOW!- yelled Nagini.

-Yeash, whats your problem?-

-ENGLISH!!!!-

"All right all right, be that way." mumbled Viper.

"Now that that's over, grab a hold of the shoe." said Cobra's dad.

"The shoe." said Viper in obvious distain. "And how will this help anything?"

"Just do it, ok?" said Mamba.

Viper and everyone else grabbed the shoe. Cobra's dad mumbled a word and Viper felt someone trying to pull his stomach. The large cavern disappeared and the entrance to what appeared to be a large mansion appeared in its place.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey look at that! Another update! Wow. Hey look it's longer too! How did this happen? There ya go peeps! Enjoy!

Nope still don't own Harry Potter -insert dramatic sigh here-

thoughts

"Speech"

-Parseltounge-

Yada yada ya… get to the story already!

Chapter 3

"Holy shit! What was that!" shrieked Viper in surprised when he landed.

"Is he always like this?" asked older Cobra, praying he wasn't.

"Yup! And this is him in an ok mood." said Cobra.

"Yeah, you should see him when he's mad. Hehehe… or maybe not. No, defiantly a bad idea." said Mamba.

"Dear god. _This _is the 'boy who lived'? And just _how_ were theyplanning on winning?" said older Cobra.

"Stuff it guys! You're just as bad as me. Hell, yours can be… the who? The boy who did what? They? Heh? What the fuck is that supposed to mean!" said Viper interrupting himself after processing what the older Cobra had said.

"Father, are you sure? There is no way Viper could be the lights savior. He's not anything like a Gryffindor Golden boy. He's waaay to Slytherin! And he obviously knows nothing of our world. Besides there is no way Dumbledork would put his golden boy savior with Vipers relatives. Hell, no one in their right mind would do that!" said Cobra in confusion.

"There no way Dumbledork would have the savior of our world serve as a house elf to those ridiculous muggles." added Mamba.

"Are they really _that _bad?" asked cobras father.

"No their worse." said Mamba.

"Much worse." said Cobra.

Cobras father then lost himself in thought for a moment, thinking about the possible mistakes Dumbledore had made with Harry Potter's life.

"Well, now that all of you are done talking about me like I'm not even here, I don't suppose you want to explain any of what you just said. Seriously, what the fuck is a house elf?! Or a muggle! And what's all this bloody 'Boy who lived' shit! You sound like you're in some sort of a fantasy novel!" shouted Viper glaring and conveniently forgetting he had done something similar with his snake speak earlier.

"He's mad." said Cobra.

"Yup! Pissed would be more accurate I believe." said Mamba.

"Sure I can see that." replied Cobra.

-BLOODY IDIOTS! Why aren't they listening! ARRRRRRRRRG- hissed Viper.

"Sorry Harry. All will be explained in good time. Come we should sit in the living room, its more comfortable. Besides, this could take a while." said Cobras father.

Viper glared at him. How the hell does he know my name? What is he psychic?

"Aaaaand you know my name… how?!" said Viper.

"All will be explained. Follow me." said Cobras father. Then when Viper obviously wasn't going anywhere added, "Please,"

Stupid fuck head. This had better be good.

Ignoring the looks he was getting from his friends, who were acting very unusual, he followed Cobras father, glaring all the way. They walked down a short hall way and into a room with a large comfortable looking couch and three large chairs arranged in a semi circle facing the couch. Behind the chair was a fireplace, a fire crackling away happily filling the room with warmth. Viper and his 2 friends took a seat on the couch and Cobras father took a seat on a chair.

"First, introductions." Then clarifying at the three boys looks, "Your _real _names. I'll start. I am Lucius Malfoy, you may call me Lucius."

"Draco Malfoy." said Cobra.

"Blaize Zabini." said Mamba.

"Harry Potter." said Viper.

"Good, now that that's finished, we can get to the more important parts. Once my son and Blaize stop attempting to catch flies in their mouths that is." said Lucius chuckling. Both Cobra and Mamba quickly shut their mouths.

"That's better. What I'm about to tell you may seem strange and unreal at first, but I assure you I do not lie. Everything I say is truth, or at least the truth as I see it, but there's no avoiding that unfortunately. You'll just have to trust me. First, I know your name because everyone knows your name. This-" said Lucius.

"WHAT! How the fuck could _everyone_ know my name!" interrupted Viper.

"You are famous. You are the 'boy who lived', the most famous person in the wizarding world." explained Lucius.

"I'm what!?! WHERE!?!" yelled Harry, thinking his friends father was more than a little nutters.

"The 'Boy Who Lived', the only known person to have survived the killing cure." replied Cobra with a sneer.

Now Viper was almost positive everyone in the room was going around the bend. Not to mention his friend, supposedly one of his _best friends_, was sneering at him. _Sneering_! Needles to say this pissed Viper off, which Viper then let known to everyone in the room. "Who the FUCK are you sneering at Cobra! Something is obviously wrong here! Maybe I should go get you people a nice white jacket each. Then you can spend all day giving yourself a nice hug in a nice white room. Stat!"

"No Viper, everything they have said is true. No need to get the insane asylum involved." said Mamba, trying to calm his hysterical friend while Lucius tried to figure out what they were talking about. Hey, he's a pureblood, he doesn't know what an insane asylum is? Nor does he see what white jackets have to do with it… He himself had a very nice white jacket thank you very much. And was having a grand old time getting lot in his thoughts until he was rudely brought out of them, "FUCK! Don't tell me you need to join them too! yelled Viper, successfully jarring Lucius out of his thoughts on white jackets.

"Mr. Malfoy, I think Viper needs a demonstration. He thinks we're al nuts." said Mamba, ignoring the incredulous look Viper was giving him.

"Yes, that would be fine, but what to show him?" said Lucius as he pulled out his wand.

Fuck! Shit! They're all insane! And now one of them has a stick! He could stab my eye out! Hasn't anyone ever told him not to play with sticks! How the bloody hell did I get into this mess?! Mamba and Cobra have always seemed sane. Where the fuck is Nagini when you need her? Help Nagini! Their gunna stab me to death with a stick!

While Viper was thinking his happy little thoughts Lucius had decided how to demonstrate magic to Viper. He had almost decided to use the imperious cure, but had decided he better not considering he might be attacked by this strange version of what should have been a Gryffindor Golden Boy.

"Draco, go drop that priceless vase over there on the floor." said Lucius, as if this happened everyday. Which Viper thought, Probably does happen all the time. These people really are nutters! Cobra did as he was told and stepped on the vase for good measure, turning the vase into dust. Cobra is gunna be in deep shit when his father finally comes to his senses. That vase look 500 times as expensive as any of Petunias and she gets pissed if they even _looked_ like her precious vase was going to get a scratch! Let alone be ground into shit on the floor!

"Reparo." said Lucius calmly. Viper stared on in amazement as the vase returned to normal. Holy shit! This is fucking amazing! I'm gunna kill those asshole Cobra and Mamba for not telling me sooner. Hell Nagini too!

"Fuck." said Viper, surprisingly speechless considering what was going through his head.

"Yeah… Fuck." said Cobra and Mamba together.

Ten minutes later, Mamba, Cobra, and Lucius, after being completely cussed out by Viper proceeded to tell Viper about the Wizarding world, Voldemort, and everything else. This took the better part of the night. Voldemort was, of course, shown in a good light and Dumbledork… I mean Dumbledore, was shown in a bad light. But hey, what did you expect? Viper was pissed when he found out Cobras and Mambas parents had worked for the man who had killed his parents.

"You mean it's your families fault I have been a SLAVE since I was old enough to walk! WHAT THE FUCK!"

Aside from that everything else made sense to Viper. He agreed that mudbloods shouldn't be told about magic because they would tell their friends and family and then their friends and family would tell _their_ friends and family and so on until everyone knew. Also because Viper had grown up with the Dursley's, he knew first hand how wizardry would be treated by most muggles. Viper definitely did _not_ want to spend the rest of his life as a science experiment! After Viper knew as much about the wizarding world as Mamba and Cobra, they three of them were sent of to bed. Of course they didn't actually _sleep_. It _was_ only 1 am. Who would go to sleep _that_ early?! They ended staying up for another hour or two talking about magic, their favorite bands, and which house they wanted to be in hen they got to Hogwarts. All three deciding unanimously on Slytherin of course. The last thing Viper thought bout before falling asleep was, I finally know what fuck Nagini was talking about when she called me Slytherin or Gryffindor!


End file.
